Sometimes I still see the baby in you… when we’re in the bath together and I spot some otherwise non-existant back fat, I remember that chubby three month old… And then the other week you were sleeping in your nappy and singlet, just like when you were new, and you pulled your legs up so they were crossed and, well, maybe it was the fact that it was dark, so I could only just see you, and you had your eyes scrunched closed, and your feet are still so wonderfully crooked… I just took a sharp inhale. It was my one week old Lior laying there! Maybe it’s the pregnancy hormones playing tricks with me…
So yes, I am pregnant. I have been since you were 13 months old. I have breastfeed you through most of that too, which hurt sometimes. I wondered when you will be ready to stop, but just three days shy of your 16 month birthday I weaned you. So you are now no longer breastfed. I agonised over this decision for a long time. I sought the council of some wise women, including your Grandma, and ultimately made a decision that was best for our family. I want you to know that sometimes in your life your Daddy and I will make decision that you don’t like, or that are not the very best thing for you personally, but we will always make decisions that we believe are best for our family as a whole. Sometimes that will mean that yes, we do make a decision that is best for you, and Daddy and I always put your needs ahead of our own, but sometimes, like with this decision, it’s not exactly what you want. I will write to you more about it later, but for now I want “grown up” you who is reading this to know that you’re not distressed or upset because you stopped feeding. A little confused maybe, and a little bit sad when you remember, but definitely not angry.
You LOVE cars and anything with wheels, and I’ve decided it is best that I follow your lead with what toys and games you are interested in rather than just offer you the things I WANT you to play with! Of course I will still offer the things I like such as crayons, and indeed you do play with them sometimes, but I bought you a matchbox car the other day, and I have asked Grandma to pick up a trike for you, so it is waiting for you at home! So you can probably stop stealing everyone else’s trikes at the park now…
On the 20th of April you got two new teeth, and then a week later you got your last “first molar”. So you now have 12 teeth. Every now and again they still give you a bit of grief as the last little bits come through, but mostly it is all over. I think we would both like a little reprieve now for a while, as teething three molars at once was NOT FUN!! I haven’t seen you in that much pain for many many months. At least this time I knew what was wrong, and could help you through!
This month you have travelled through Italy (Rome, up the coast to Cinque Terre, and through to Milan and back), and Budapest in Hungary. Next month we plan to tick up to five more countries of the list!
On the first of May you started running! You are so quick, and you fall down sometimes, but you just pick yourself up and keep going. I am so proud of your resilience!
Your favourite key on the keyboard is the space bar. You beam with pride when I open up a little document for you and let you type away. If you can see Daddy doing the same thing, you are extra proud!
You like to eat corn, red kidney beans, bread and pasta. You use to like bananas and other fruit, but it tastes different here in Hungary, so you have gone off it a bit. You also really love peanut butter.
You can say “mum” “dad” and “Uh Oh” really well, and in the right context. You are also AMAZING at comprehending what we are saying. Just yesterday we were sitting together on the floor and I said to you, “Can you get me the Peppa Pig book?” (a Peppa Pig activity book in Italian, so you can continue to learn Italiana when we get home, and you’re older), and you actually got up from my lap, walked into the lounge, found the right book and brought it back to me!! WHAT. IS HAPPENING?! Sometimes you are eating something and I need to take a break from handing you things and so I say “Just wait”. So you actually nod you head to say “yes” (you nod and shake your head for yes and no very competently) and then sit there staring at me and don’t ask me for any more for like 20 seconds. It is quite amazing. Instead of “wait” Daddy says “aspetto” which is wait in Italian, and you know what that means too.
You are getting a bit cheeky, and when we say “no” (you definitely know what yes and no mean!), you sometimes just give us a grin and then carry on doing it. So I think we will need to investigate some disciplinary measures!
Your favourite book is “Goodnight Sleep Tight” by Mem Fox. Your Aunty Fairlie gave it to you for your birthday, and you request it every night before bed, and multiple times during the day. You like to dance to the sing-song-y rhymes!
This month you also celebrated Mother’s Day with me. Yesterday in fact! You and Bean treated me to a wonderful breakfast, and a we’ll have a photo shoot when we get home so that we can remember our beautiful family, just the three of us.
I love you Lior Picard. And I love your name. Now that I’m pregnant again I often think about when you were this little inside me, and the miracle of birthing you, and how far we’ve come since then. I think about the joy you bring, and the love I experience daily because of your presence in my life. I am so incredibly blessed to be your mother, and I love you more than words can say. You are my sunshine. I love you.
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